A Mini Photo Shoot

A friend of ours, Sara Gray, is starting a photography business.  So, as a swap, we posed for her to help her start her portfolio, and we got some really great photos for free.  We were going to do Caden's 12 month pictures anyway, and luckily, were really blessed with Sara's offer.  Here are just a few samples:-)

Baby Mind-Reading

So many times, you have to just wonder....

What in the world was he thinking about?

A Year of Joy

525,600 minutes spent thinking about this little boy

8,760 hours of overwhelming adoration

365 days of unending, heart melting love

52 weeks of I-could-eat-you-up kisses

12 months of blissful blue eyes and bubbly laughter

1 year of my-cup-runneth-over joy

Dry Spell

Oftentimes, as I lay down to sleep, I think of this blog that I have let go dormant over the last few months and I wonder, 'Why haven't I written?'

I think the more applicable question would be, 'Where do I start?' 

I was writing pretty regularly up until November, and then suddenly it seemed, I stopped.  Looking back now, I see two reasons for this lull.  The first is that I have been trying to write a young adult book.  For awhile there, I was really on a roll.  I think I felt like whatever free time I could muster between teaching 8th grade, doing laundry, cooking, cleaning, and taking care of Caden, should be entirely devoted to writing this book.  Well, sometime in December I got to the 10,000 word mark (Yipee! you say and then I inform you that I need 3-4 times that amount:-).  Promptly after that, I got writer's block and haven't written since.  So any time I spend on the blog incites guilt for spending time here and not there.  Am I making any sense? Anyway, this, I believe, is only one of the reasons for my blogging hiatus.

The other reason happened back in early November when Brian got laid off from his bank job.  I never would have connected the two, but this was a big event in our life and I didn't want to talk about it here, in the open like this.  And if I couldn't talk about it then it was like a huge blockage on all other creative outlets.  Almost like I, myself, have to be an open book in order to emote and divulge my life here in this blog and there in my book.  

A lot has happened since November.  Brian got a job with Sterling Savings Bank.  We are blessed and grateful that in this economy he can get a job in his field.  He has also decided to go back to school for health administration.  Starting in September, he will work and take classes and become a very busy man.  We have also taken two trips, one to California and the other to Arizona.  And the icing on the cake, and why nothing will ever truly get us down, our little man turned one (and that is another blog all to itself!)

I think perhaps my writer's block has let up.  Some people don't believe in writer's block, and I can honestly tell you that for me it exists in a realm of emotional truths.  When I am open then my words feel free to come up and out.  When I don't use this space, I feel a void somewhere deep in my heart, as if, my words mean more out loud than they do locked up inside me.  

Little Boy Wonder

This Little Boy Wonder will soon be turning one.  Three weeks from now, he will leave the months behind and start to be known in years.  How did it happen? Where did the time go?  He is always on the move, exploring and tasting, testing and experimenting.  There is so much wonder in his face as he takes in the world around him.  He wants to walk so badly and his desire to communicate brings on much yelling.  I completely rescind any prior posts about Brian being the loudest person I know.  I'm sorry, honey.  You have been outmatched.  This little boy is still a baby, but it is disappearing faster than I would like.  These first twelve months have been an adventure I could never have imagined.  Such joy to behold.  What will the next twelve bring, my baby, my little boy wonder?

The Mirror

I had a very strange out of body experience this past week.  I was at my mom's house in my old room that had been converted into a baby's room.  As I was rocking Caden, I glanced at myself in the mirror, the same mirror I have looked into a thousand times before.  A rush of images filled my head.  I saw myself on my bed talking to my cat; I saw my friend Amy doing homework with me in 8th grade; I saw myself getting ready for dances and parties; I saw the scrutiny of teenage eyes that wondered why I wasn't skinnier and the laughter that bounced around the room from sleepovers.  I saw the girl who used to play with dolls and the girl who wore a cinderella dress to prom.  I saw her and knew she was me, but as those memories were flooding my mind, I looked through them and saw that same girl rocking her baby, and I couldn't believe we were one and the same.  I looked at her again, and for the first time, felt all grown up.  I think that sometimes I still think of myself as that teenager, but the face that was reflected back to me contained no scrutiny or self-doubt.  It gave me pause because I liked what I saw: the girl who became a woman; the girl who became a mom.  Suddenly, I saw clearly. 

Winter Wonderland

For those of you that don't live in the Portland/Seattle area, persistent snow is not normal.  Snow that sticks and stays for a whole week or more, snow that falls in big flakes and small, snow that rests gently on our big tall fir trees is just not normal.  

And for you teachers and students out there, neither is three weeks of Christmas break, for that matter.  

But as inconvenient as it is for Christmas shopping, Christmas parties, and Christmas-time plans, it is sure cause to stop and rest and enjoy.  Because, ironically, how often does that happen around the holidays?  So whether you are snowed in (and maybe getting cabin fever) or lying on a beach somewhere (please, oh please, get a tan for me), take a day or even a few hours and just stop.  Make some cookies with your kids, put your pajamas on and watch a movie, or just sit in your most decorated room and do nothing else but rest and enjoy. 

'Tis the Season...to make the holidays what you want them to be.